I hope my sister doesn't hurt me too badly for sharing the following email with my friends. She tries to tell her siblings that she is not a writer but I think she sells herself far short. The passing of my mother was particularly difficult for her since she was just 42 years old when my mother went on to heaven. (Sorry for sharing, Rach!) Her oldest child is just 20 years old and her youngest, Seth, just turned 8 in October. While the rest of us miss our mom a lot, I had an extra 15 years with my mother that she didn't have. I am blessed by my family -- my brothers - Tim, Mark, Joel and Thad .. and our sister, Rachel. Thank you, Rachel, for putting into words what we all must feel but you described so eloquently!! I wanted to include a few photos .. and found a treasure -- the one of my mother with Allen and Bob. They shared the name "FIL" (Favorite In-Law) and bantered with her about which one carried the name at that particular moment! What memories to treasure!!
Dear Fam,
On Tuesday I was ordering our Christmas cards and the lady taking my order, which we have known for 10 years or so, put all the pictures down and said I will do this later. She proceeded to say, "Rachel, you lost your mother, my dad has been gone since February and I don't know how I am going to get thru this Thanksgiving. She started to cry and I felt as if Mother's gift of ministering came thru me as I told her how difficult this past year had been, but yet God gave us peace and helped the pain to ease a little.
I told her how last year I felt it very helpful to ease the grief and write a Thanksgiving prayer and thank God for all the things I learned from my mom and it helped me realize how blessed we truly are....On that basis I would like to take this opportunity to write another Thanksgiving prayer.....
"Dear God why did G'ma have to die?"
God, this is the question I hear so often from our Seth Mark.....He will be playing quietly with his legos and out of the blue this question will come. How do I answer this 8 year old who never even had the opportunity to spend as much time with her as the rest of us did? He seems to have a special bond with her.
Thank you God for the memories I can share with him to keep her close to his little heart. ( He was the first to break down and cry when we were at the cemetery on the one year anniversary of her passing)
Here are a few of the memories I want to share with him:
I can still hear her voice as she would call usually around 8:00 a.m. and ask "What do you have planned for today? I am having my devotions and I am praying for you....stay encouraged, God is still on the throne." Man, I sure miss hearing that!
I can still hear her shout praised to God when she was blessed and felt God's reassurance that all of her children were going to make it to Heaven......God will answer her prayers...
G'ma's touch was always so special as she would hug all of us when we came to visit and she loved all the little things the children were involved in and always made over all their accomplishments no matter how small.....Bible quizzing, basketball games, plays, etc. The children always wanted to call and tell G'ma how they did on their Bible quiz since they knew G'ma and &G'pa were praying for them....we still call G'pa and report to him and it he still enjoys sharing in their successes.
She touched our lives with the prayers she prayed daily for each one of us.
I find myself thinking about the smells of wonderful food cooking.....especially on Sundays as Mother would make her famous pork roast, carrot casserole, or chili, and meatloaf....These recipes I am passing on to my children and I tho't about her as I was putting the turkey in the oven today. She would always get up so early.
It's hard to believe over a year has passed, God, you've been so close when a wave of grief has passed over us and we just want to call Mother. The pain is not as fresh, but it is still a dull ache in our hears and lives. I have felt her near many times when I have been so discouraged and so overloaded, I've wanted to just call her. I then realize she has reached her goal...Heaven....I then think of the many times when we could come to visit she would be waiting in the doorway of their apartment and hug each one of us and welcome us home. One day I believe she will waiting at Heaven's gate for us and she will say, "I've been waiting for you, I knew you could make it and I'm so proud of you."
So God, would you tell my mother "Happy Thanksgiving"? Please tell her we are caring for Dad just like she would've wanted us to do.
God, thank You also for letting us have Dad live closer to us. Our children, especially Juliana, Seth, and Shaley have said so many time when we have been with G'pa, "I wish G'ma could've lived closer like G'pa then we could've spent more time with her and she could've come to church with us too.
Thank You for carrying Dad thru many hospital visits this year and allowing him to be with us this Thanksgiving. He has continued to minister to so many people. People stop me regularly to tell me what a blessing he is to them and how much they love him. What a gift he continues to be to us and so many others...in singing and praying with people.
Thank You God for my wonderful sister and brothers, husband and children who have been such a support this last year. Their love for Dad/G'pa and the grief over the loss of Mother/G'ma, has made an even stronger bond between us.
So, God when Seth asks again "Why did G'ma have to die" or Juliana writes me a note saying "I know you miss your mom and I really miss G'ma", help me to continue to instill in them the legacy of prayer and commitment to You that reminds us we can see her again someday!
Amen
On Tuesday I was ordering our Christmas cards and the lady taking my order, which we have known for 10 years or so, put all the pictures down and said I will do this later. She proceeded to say, "Rachel, you lost your mother, my dad has been gone since February and I don't know how I am going to get thru this Thanksgiving. She started to cry and I felt as if Mother's gift of ministering came thru me as I told her how difficult this past year had been, but yet God gave us peace and helped the pain to ease a little.
I told her how last year I felt it very helpful to ease the grief and write a Thanksgiving prayer and thank God for all the things I learned from my mom and it helped me realize how blessed we truly are....On that basis I would like to take this opportunity to write another Thanksgiving prayer.....
"Dear God why did G'ma have to die?"
God, this is the question I hear so often from our Seth Mark.....He will be playing quietly with his legos and out of the blue this question will come. How do I answer this 8 year old who never even had the opportunity to spend as much time with her as the rest of us did? He seems to have a special bond with her.
Thank you God for the memories I can share with him to keep her close to his little heart. ( He was the first to break down and cry when we were at the cemetery on the one year anniversary of her passing)
Here are a few of the memories I want to share with him:
I can still hear her voice as she would call usually around 8:00 a.m. and ask "What do you have planned for today? I am having my devotions and I am praying for you....stay encouraged, God is still on the throne." Man, I sure miss hearing that!
I can still hear her shout praised to God when she was blessed and felt God's reassurance that all of her children were going to make it to Heaven......God will answer her prayers...
G'ma's touch was always so special as she would hug all of us when we came to visit and she loved all the little things the children were involved in and always made over all their accomplishments no matter how small.....Bible quizzing, basketball games, plays, etc. The children always wanted to call and tell G'ma how they did on their Bible quiz since they knew G'ma and &G'pa were praying for them....we still call G'pa and report to him and it he still enjoys sharing in their successes.
She touched our lives with the prayers she prayed daily for each one of us.
I find myself thinking about the smells of wonderful food cooking.....especially on Sundays as Mother would make her famous pork roast, carrot casserole, or chili, and meatloaf....These recipes I am passing on to my children and I tho't about her as I was putting the turkey in the oven today. She would always get up so early.
It's hard to believe over a year has passed, God, you've been so close when a wave of grief has passed over us and we just want to call Mother. The pain is not as fresh, but it is still a dull ache in our hears and lives. I have felt her near many times when I have been so discouraged and so overloaded, I've wanted to just call her. I then realize she has reached her goal...Heaven....I then think of the many times when we could come to visit she would be waiting in the doorway of their apartment and hug each one of us and welcome us home. One day I believe she will waiting at Heaven's gate for us and she will say, "I've been waiting for you, I knew you could make it and I'm so proud of you."
So God, would you tell my mother "Happy Thanksgiving"? Please tell her we are caring for Dad just like she would've wanted us to do.
God, thank You also for letting us have Dad live closer to us. Our children, especially Juliana, Seth, and Shaley have said so many time when we have been with G'pa, "I wish G'ma could've lived closer like G'pa then we could've spent more time with her and she could've come to church with us too.
Thank You for carrying Dad thru many hospital visits this year and allowing him to be with us this Thanksgiving. He has continued to minister to so many people. People stop me regularly to tell me what a blessing he is to them and how much they love him. What a gift he continues to be to us and so many others...in singing and praying with people.
Thank You God for my wonderful sister and brothers, husband and children who have been such a support this last year. Their love for Dad/G'pa and the grief over the loss of Mother/G'ma, has made an even stronger bond between us.
So, God when Seth asks again "Why did G'ma have to die" or Juliana writes me a note saying "I know you miss your mom and I really miss G'ma", help me to continue to instill in them the legacy of prayer and commitment to You that reminds us we can see her again someday!
Amen
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